Front page worthy comment

Since the Musical Chairs post is already a few days old, comments are less likely to be read. But this recent comment is good enough to have it's very own post so I'm pulling it to the front page. Plus, this saves me from having to write my own post and I still get credit for updating the ol' bloggity blog. And if you look really hard, you might find the inspiration for the bacon 'stache. Although I must admit, Zac could take a few lessons from me on 'the look'.

Zac said...

Musical Chairs? Are you serious? What happened to the good ol' company softball team? Pro Flowers had to opt for a lame-o childs game to make you feel like part of "the team" and then it denied you a measly $100 prize when the company is making money hand over fist? Sounds like you got punked.

On the other hand, my job is the shiznit. Not only do I have access to the Bureau of Prisons database (I was among the first to know where Moutha Stewart was going to do her time), but I also get to interact with some of the biggest snitches in the nation, including former mafia God Fathers, Aryan Brotherhood commissioners, and MS-13 turncoats. If that isn't enough, I get to work in the capital city of the greatest country in the world, where it is a regular occurance to see motorcades of politicians (who, incidentally, are also some of the biggest crooks), diplomats, foreign dignitaries, and even the President of the United States clogging up the very streets on which I drive to and from work. Even Borat made an apperance at the nearby "Kazak" embasy before walking to the White House to demand a meeting with the President.

Need I mention the hot dog vendors on every corner who curiously remain in their portable, toiletless kiosks all day long without ever leaving and with no sink to wash their hands? I have decided that these super human vendors must be equiped with very large bladders or posessed by demons. The latter would not be surprising considering the controversay over the satanic and masonic symbols evident in the layout of the streets of our Nation's Capital.

Speaking of the Masons, I bet your SD doesn't have the House of the Temple, Head Quarters of the Supreme Council of the 33rd Degree of Freemasonry. Masons come from all over the world to this edifice to receive their 33rd Degree initiation. But they arent the only ones who flock to this great city.

Thousands of people pay their way to visit Washington DC every year, whereas you and all your tax paying friends pay me to come to DC every day. Although you might get to attend the occasional baseball game because the sport is so boring that they can't sell out the stadium and have to resort to giving corporations like Pro Flowers discounts on the nosebleed sections, I get to work in a city where every museum is free. So rather than spending several hours wondering when something exciting in baseball will happen, or trying to understand the difference between NASCAR and Funnycar, I can stroll into a building full of artifacts covering just about any topic interesting to anyone with a pulse. If that doesn't have you convinced, consider that one day during every summer, Ben and Jerry's offers free ice cream all day long to anyone visiting the old post office building.

I'm not sure if it's the Coffee Toffee ice cream or the miriad possibilities of thought provoking entertainment that has people lining up to visit the city where I work, but I do know that you wont find people lining up outside the doors of Pro Flowers to get a shot at that musical chair prize.

And, last time I checked, Uncle Sam isn't giving out any deductions for having a cat, so please accept a heartfelt thank you from the bottom of my heart for contributing more of your taxable income (which hopefully includes that prize money) to make possible my prestigious postiion.

Besides, I have my own team of musical chair players and I could play every evening if I wanted to. Let me be the first to tell you that it gets dull quite fast. There comes a point when they couldn't pay you to play another round. Instead, you should try taking up a sport with a little more thrill and skill in it like water skiing, which I am able to do quite regularly during the summer months.

In conclusion, you might get free flowers and a few nights of baseball boredom, but my job is better.

P.S. I grow my own flowers, because, yes, I am that good.